Sad, is it?

Is it sad when your spouse doesn’t or never prays for you?

Is it sad when you ask your spouse to pray and you don’t hear your name being uttered in any form, pet name, or official passport name?

Is it sad when your spouse prays for everyone else including siblings from either side, friends, children, neighbors, or even property and items in the house but not you?

Is it sad when your spouse doesn’t consult you on decisions that affect your family?

Is it sad to find out that your spouse, yes, that one you respect and appreciate so much always seeks advice from other quarters apart from you?

Is it sad, yes sad to discover that your spouse is a perennial liar but only to you? The saddest bit is even in tiny minute things, he will lie without butting his eyelids.

Is it sad when he spends money and doesn’t disclose how he depleted the family savings?

Is it sad when your spouse comes home with new outfits, phones, digital gadgets yet your lifetime project hangs in the balance?

Is it sad when your spouse consults others and acts without informing you the partner on why some things were done? 

Is it sad that the push to have children doesn’t come from you but from your parents-in-law?

Is it sad that naming your son or daughter is done only for you to discover that the names on the documents are different? The pronunciation is almost the same but the spelling is different, is it sad, really?

Is it sad that you can’t even choose the color of your next car?

Most of the time these decisions are the minor ones. Rarely are you even spoken to when it comes to the major projects which are at times deemed as minor to him and major to you.

Is it sad to find out through your son that the auntie/ uncle or a family friend passed by? 

And as a cartoon character a light bulb moment occurs, because something looks different.

You question your thoughts. “Is this why we have new locks on the kitchen cabinets? Aaahaa ahaaa, Ooooh so that’s why the office was painted a shade of blue rather than white, what I preferred? This is the reason for the new recipe of my favourite meal?" Is it sad? 

Is it sad when you are both invited to a function but as the husband you don’t show up? No explanation but excuses of “I was extremely tired after the day's work activities” Or I just didn’t want to attend.” Is it sad?

Is it sad when your spouse doesn’t respectfully treat you well especially in public? Shouts at you when angry, and will always seek to resolve issues there and then whether in private or public, it doesn’t matter. is it sad?

Is it sad when she doesn’t want to appreciate and accept you just the way you are?

Is it sad when you can’t even decide which school your daughter may go to? Is it really?

Is it sad that even the estate you will leave in the next five years can’t be decided by you?

20 years down the marriage journey, but she still treats you like a child. Is it sad?

Is it sad when you react to issues, you are accused of being insensitive, indifferent, without empathy, generally unhappy?

Is it sad if after all these words you won’t and can’t change because none of the above affects you?

But yet again, is it that sad?