NOT IN AFRICA

It’s almost 3:00 am in the morning. My head is jerking back and forth as if nodding to an imaginary friend sitted across the room. Only that there is no one else in the house.

My boss traveled abroad with his family and two nannies. He wanted his two sets of twins taken care of as him and his family enjoyed the hot sun in Ibiza.

I look at the huge Television screen in front of me and what I’m seeing doesn’t make sense.

I our WhatsApp group we agreed to post a photo once someone voted. The polling station had less than 400 voters. 

Those who agreed to vote would then share on the platform of about 360 individuals. The golden agers would be assisted by their GenZ relatives. 

By the time voting ended even after an extension of four hours with me reasons that couldn’t be substantiated, the counting was done and results announced.

We all knew who had won in our polling stations. The returning officer was recorded reading out the results.

I couldn’t believe my eyes, the results on TV and the recording I had were two different results.

The only sensible thing here was the name of our ward and polling station. Every other information was adulterated. 

This wasn’t happening. No!

I went to the WhatsApp group. Kitileshwa ward. Three hundred and fifty six texts. Frankly, I couldn’t read all the texts. After skimming through the text, I discovered that all of us were asserting the same message.

None of us could believe what we were witnessing. The recording was downloading. No sooner had it completed the process, was it deleted 

Luckily, at least twenty-three people had already downloaded it before it was deleted.

Now, I posted the clip on X, IG and FB.  The hashtag #MikoraTupu🇰🇪 

Immediately people saw it, an uproar started online. Those with data bundles reposted the clip and the hashtag as well.

The returning officer was heard and seen saying that he had done his best to ensure a free and fair election. Never in my wildest dreams was I to ever envision this. 

I used to hear stories of rigging in elections. Papa had tried to enlighten me what rigging is but for sure nothing could prepare anyone anymore of votes being stolen.

In 2027 for crying out loud. After the famous GenZ protests? How could one even think of stealing votes?

My preferred candidate was losing. I decided to go and sleep because my boss called me and was laughing hysterically.  He said something that I didn’t want to hear. “I told you…. the incumbent… in between skimps of laughter… a leader in Africa can’t be defeated in a reelection contest, Hehehehehe.” went on my boss “He has ALLLL government machinery. That's what is happening. This was followed by a rather prolonged laugh that catalyzed sleep like a pill.

The sun was quite high up in the sky when my eyes managed to open up. Checked my watch and went to the bathroom. I had some weird noises from far away.  My boss’ house was approximately one kilometer from the main road. 

He was wealthy and fairly good compared to other billionaires. He made sure that all my needs were always catered for. I could eat and drink whatever I wanted. 

I got to the kitchen. Served a tumbler of milk. Took a cookie from the jar and made my way to the TV room.

I couldn’t believe my eyes.

Checked my phone, WhatsApp application had more than six hundred messages.

What is happening to me? I took a sip of the milk then another and choked on the third sip, coughing and sneezing all the milk accompanied with other fluids to the carpeted TV room. 

My phone rung. Voilà, it went off. “How can I fail to charge the phone.”

Plugged in the cable on the socket and after a minute or so it came back to life. After finding my way to twitter. The notifications were way beyond what I could imagine. This had never happened ever since I started using social media.

The clip had gone viral. Seventy-seven thousand five hundred and twenty-three likes and counting. What had I done?  Four thousand and thirteen retweets. Over a million impressions 

The house phone rings. It was louder than usual. Could it be the deprived sleep?

I took the receiver. The voice on the other side loud and commandeering said, “SWITCH OFF ALL ELECTRONIC GADGETS.” As I headed to switch off some of the gadgets. My boss said, “SWITCH OFF THE POWER.” 

“Go to my bedroom….” I tried to interject but for the first time in the two years I worked for Wabiggy, he SHOUTED at me.

“GO TO MY BEDROOM NOW.” 

My response was filled with both anger and panic. “Sir Wabiggy, your bedroom door is always locked, HOW CAN I ACCESS THE ROOM?”

“GO NOW!” Heyeld. 

Peeped out of the window and saw men dressed in black running towards to main door.

Yunked myself up, leaping towards the main door and barricaded it with all security features, then rushed to the bedroom wing of the massive house.

As I made my way to the master bedroom I switched off the power system. I heard some cogs clutching here and there then one last latch locked itself with a fairly loud bang.

I lurched towards the bedroom rushed in and the door closed with a few latches behind me followed by two very loud bangs. The second one was the loudest and seemed to be very very heavy metal hitting the floor.

Tried to switch the lights on but couldn’t see a thing.

It was pitch dark. As I moved forward my eyes started adjusting. I saw what appeared to be an escalator descending downwards. Not knowing what to do without even thinking twice, jumped on it and I descended slowly. Supporting both hands on the guardrails. 

I fell off the escalator and bumped my face on a wooden chest of drawers. Collected my body parts and assembled them together, put the left leg first followed by the right one. Slowly I crawled towards a light that brightened as I approached it.

My highest body part started panicking. Stood up and slowly very slowly walked for a minute then at a distance I saw the source light.

I walked faster toward the blurry yellow light. Found a sit, upon stumbling to sit down, I pressed a button. Something was moving, yet I couldn’t see it. 

The mass beneath me started rotating anticlockwise. Then without any warning I heard a familiar sound. My boss was laughing uncontrollably. 

“Your video is trending globally. What did you do?” 

The video clip I posted had six million likes and counting as if counting money… trrrrrrrrrr… with every like being represented with continuous “r.”

The rotating floor halted. Then a super bright light came to life. It was a screen, a huge TV screen.  Approximately 200 inches segmented in about ten potions showing different angles of the whole compound. That is when I noticed another lot of masked men were trying to break the front door. 

Wabiggy was laughing wildly. His wife tried to stop him but that made it worse. His laughter was addictive. I tried to laugh but could manage just two or three seconds of a faint chuckle.

“SEVEN MILLION!”  She shouted. “You are a celeb now.” Have you ever been full of joy yet have some specks of panic. That was my state of emotions bursting inwards uncontrollably.

The body parts associated with jumping up and down wanted to leap with joy but panic started sinking me into sorrow. My brain couldn’t comprehend the impact I had made globally.

A few months ago I personally witnessed how my boss Wabiggy had been mishandled in the past.

Wabiggy noticed my happy but sad face. He assured me “nothing will happen to you.” He said with a smirk on his face.

“In fact go to the screen, touch the lawn, long press the lawn and a dialogue box will appear.” I did exactly that. As soon as I clicked sprinkler. Water came out of the sprinklers so fast that some of the masked men took cover afraid of what might to happen next.

Some shots seemed to be were fired but I couldn’t hear anything. The eleven masked men and one female tried in vain to locate something they seemed to be searching for. 

After three hours, very long hours. Frustration crept in, one of them removed the mask and what seemed to be a heavy jacket. That’s when I noticed it was a lady.

She shot at the windows. All of them. Going all around the massive house ensuring that all windows had bullet holes. 

On the screen, I saw something that amazed me. I had only seen this in animated movies. Every time a window was shot at, a metallic barricade dropped down shut. 

The masked men and the lady hoped to gain access into the house through the windows but the force of the metallic barricade deterred them from trying to access the house.

I watched in disbelief and horror as one of the men’s arm was separated from his body. 

The weird thing is, the lopped-off arm was lobbed out of the barricade through an opening beneath the window then the opening disappeared. It couldn’t be seen.

Two men signaled a man standing a few meters from them and a vehicle with government plates appeared. The arm and the man wreathing in pain were taken away. Probably to a hospital.

Wabiggy’s wife shouted eighteen million. “Aaaaah” my face was utterly blank. I didn’t know how to express the joy in my heart.

For once in my life I had made an impact. Not only in my country but globally.

The president has just resigned shouted Wabiggy’s wife. “THE PRESIDENT HAS JUST RESIGNED.” 

SEVENTY FOUR MILLION likes, me Raramo Kabeso a young boy from Keroka, made a whole president concede the election and resign…

I woke up. The bed sheets were everywhere. Moved over to draw the curtains. Just before I knew it I was on the floor head first.  A bump formed at the extreme corner of my forehead. 

Looking at the curtains, which seemed familiar… 

I laughed out loud, and shouted  “NOT IN AFRICA!”